Do you need help managing your urges?
Urges to gamble come and go, just like waves in the ocean. Like waves, urges rise in intensity then eventually fade away. Urge surfing involves staying present with the urge, observing it and acknowledging how you experience it, without giving in to it. With practice, this technique will feel more comfortable and you’ll start to feel more control over your urges.
Does your family member or friend need help managing their urges?
If you know someone who is experiencing gambling harm, it's important to understand that urges to gamble come and go, just like waves in the ocean. Like waves, urges rise in intensity then eventually fade away.
You can encourage your family member or friend to practice urge surfing, which involves them staying present with the urge, observing it and acknowledging how they experience it, without giving in to it. With practice, this technique will feel more comfortable and they’ll start to feel more control over their urges. Supporting them to learn this technique can help them on their recovery journey.
Does someone need help managing their urges?
As a professional working with someone who is experiencing gambling harm, it may be helpful for you to understand and discuss urges with them.
Urges come and go, just like waves in the ocean. Like waves, urges rise in intensity then eventually fade away. You can encourage the person you’re working with to practice urge surfing by staying present with the urge, observing it and acknowledging how they experience it, without giving in to it. With practice, this technique will feel more comfortable and they’ll start to feel more control over their urges. Your support and guidance in teaching them this technique can be a valuable tool in their recovery journey.
What is urge surfing?
If we observe an urge with a curious and open attitude, it will eventually fade away. However, if we try to fight the urge by telling ourselves things like "I can't handle this urge, I need to make it go away now," it can actually make the urge stronger and last longer. If we give in to the urge, we reinforce the behaviour and may lose confidence in our ability to change.
Urge surfing involves:
Focusing on the area where you experience the urge.
Acknowledging how you experience the urge.
Releasing the tension as you release each deep breath.
Repeatedly focusing with each part of your body that experiences the urge
How can people urge surf?
There are slight variations of the urge surfing technique, but most include the following steps:
- Start by finding a quiet and comfortable place where you won't be interrupted. Gently close your eyes or soften and lower your gaze. Take a few deep breaths and focus on the quality of your breathing.
- Identify any urges you may be feeling to gamble. Don't try to resist or push these feelings away, just acknowledge and observe them, without judgment.
- Now, imagine that you're surfing on a wave. As you ride the wave, you may feel the urge to gamble rising and falling like the crest and trough of the wave.
- Keep breathing deeply and focus on the physical sensations in your body as you ride the wave. Notice any tension or discomfort in your muscles, but don't try to change or fix anything. Just observe.
- As you continue to ride the wave, remember that the urge to gamble is temporary and will pass. Focus on the sensation of the wave carrying you forward and let the urge to gamble flow past you like a wave.
- Keep riding the wave for as long as you need to, continuing to observe your thoughts and feelings without judgment. If your mind starts to wander, gently bring your attention back to the present moment and the sensation of surfing on the wave.
- When you're ready to finish the activity, take a few more deep breaths and thank yourself for taking the time to ride the wave and observe your urges without giving in to them. Gently open your eyes.
Urge surfing gets easier with practice. Don’t worry if it doesn’t come naturally at first. Keep practising and it will become easier over time. It can be a powerful tool for managing your gambling urges.
Listening to a recording of the urge surfing technique can be very useful, especially when starting out. There are many free videos and mobile apps available that can help you learn the technique. You can search for "urge surfing" videos on YouTube or check out your mobile app store to find one that suits you. Take the time to try out different options and find the one that works best for you.
Do you want more help?
For more information about managing your urges, see our information on Understanding Urges. You could also try a different technique instead – see our self-help activity on Urges and the 5Ds: Delay, Distract, Deep breathe, Decide, Discuss.
For more help with managing your urges, you can also start an online chat with us or call the Gambling Helpline on 1800 858 858 – free, confidential, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. These services are available to support anyone affected by gambling harm, including family members or friends.
It can be difficult to watch a family member or friend experience gambling urges. Urge surfing can be a powerful tool to help them manage their urges. However, it may take time and practice for them to become comfortable with this technique. Encourage them to stick with it and not give up if they don’t see immediate results. With repetition, they will notice it getting easier over time.
You may like to suggest to your family member or friend listens to a recording of the urge surfing technique, especially when they’re starting out. There are many free videos and mobile apps available that can help them learn the technique. They can search for "urge surfing" videos on YouTube or check out their mobile app store. Encourage your family member or friend to take their time and try out different options until they find one that works best for them.
Do you want more help?
For more information about managing urges, see our information on Understanding Urges. Your family member or friend could also try a different technique instead – see our self-help activity on Urges and the 5Ds: Delay, Distract, Deep breathe, Decide, Discuss.
For more help with managing their urges, you or your family member or friend can start an online chat with us or call the Gambling Helpline on 1800 858 858 – free, confidential, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
These services are available to support anyone affected by gambling harm, including family members or friends like you. It’s not only the person who gambles that can be affected, but the people close to them too. It’s important to take care of yourself when you’re supporting someone else. Check out the family and friends section in our peer support community to connect with people who understand.
Urge surfing can be a powerful technique to manage gambling urges. As a professional, you can support the person you’re working with by encouraging them to try surfing their gambling urges. However, it may take time and practice for them to become comfortable with this technique. You should support them to stick with it and not give up if they don’t see immediate results. With repetition, they will notice it getting easier over time.
As a professional, you can provide additional resources and support as needed. You may like to suggest to the person you’re working with listens to a recording of the urge surfing technique, especially when they’re starting out. There are many free videos and mobile apps available that can help them to learn the technique. They can search for "urge surfing" videos on YouTube or go to their mobile app store. Encourage them to take their time and try out different options until they find one that works best for them.
Want more help?
For more information about managing urges, see our information on Understanding Urges. The person you’re working with could also try a different technique instead – see our self-help activity on Urges and the 5Ds: Delay, Distract, Deep breathe, Decide, Discuss.
For more help with managing their urges, you or the person you’re working with can start an online chat with us or call the Gambling Helpline on 1800 858 858 – free, confidential, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
These services are available to support anyone affected by gambling harm, including family members, friends, and professionals like you. It can be hard for professionals to support people with gambling issues. To learn more about how you can help, go to our section on How Professionals Can Help.
