Are you a young person worried about an adult’s gambling?
The impact of harmful gambling can be significant and far-reaching, not just for the person with the gambling issue but also for their family members, especially children. Recent research suggests that almost 14% of Australian children are exposed to harmful gambling by a parent each year.
It can be really stressful if your mum or dad or someone else that you care about is gambling too much. You might be worried about the family’s financial situation or about arguments between your family members. It can also hurt if they don’t spend much time with you or they always seem to be thinking about other things.
It can be hard to know what to do or where to turn. The good news is that there are many people who can help you, including your family members, friends, teachers, community or religious leaders, school counsellors, or local GPs. There are also lots of services that are there to support children and families affected by gambling. They can listen to your concerns, provide advice and help you find the right resources to get the help you need.
Are you worried about a young person who lives in a gambling family?
Many professionals, like teachers, school counsellors, youth workers, or health professionals, may come across young people who have a parent or caregiver with an issue with their gambling. It’s essential to understand that this can have a significant impact not just on the person who is struggling with their gambling but also on their family members, particularly children. Recent research has shown that almost 14% of Australian children are exposed to harmful gambling by a parent each year.
Young people who have a parent or caregiver with a gambling issue may experience a range of emotions, including stress and worry about the family’s financial situation, arguments between family members, and feeling neglected or unimportant. As a professional, you may be able to provide a safe and non-judgemental space for them to express their concerns and worries.
It can be challenging for young people to know what to do or where to turn for help. As a professional, you may be in a good position to provide guidance and support By working together with the young person and their family, you can help them identify the resources and services they need to move towards a healthier and happier future.
What are the impacts of family member gambling for young people?
When a parent or other adult has an issue with their gambling, it can have a huge impact on the young people in the family.
Children living in families with an adult who has an issue with their gambling may:
- Lose trust because of lies, secrets and broken promises
- Feel depressed or powerless
- Blame themselves for the issue
- Feel anxious or scared
- Have lowered self-esteem
- Have reduced quality time with their family members
- Feel a lack of security and stability
- Feel ashamed, angry, hurt or lonely
- Be confused about what is happening
- Not have enough to eat
- Not be able to have new clothes or shoes when they need them
- Miss out on activities – like sport, school excursions, camps or music lessons
- Have trouble with their studies
- Have to take on more ‘adult’ responsibilities – like looking after younger children
- See lots of arguments or sense tension
- Have problems at school
- Withdraw from family life
- Experience family violence
People who grow up with an adult in their home who has an issue with their gambling are more likely to develop an issue with gambling themselves when they grow up.
What are the signs of parental (or other family member) gambling issues?
There are lots of signs to look out for if you think a parent or other family member has an issue with their gambling. You may have noticed the way they act, their mood, their relationships with other family members and friends, or their finances. Excessive gambling can affect all of these parts of people’s lives. Look out for these clues.
- Being less involved in hobbies or recreational activities
- Using alcohol or drugs more often
- Constantly checking their phone
- Changes in sleeping or eating patterns
- Taking longer than usual for simple tasks - like going to the local shops
- Refusing to talk about where they have spent their time
- Always talking about gambling
- Talking about sports in terms of odds
- Seeming down or moody
- Arguing with family and friends about money
- Spending less time with family and friends
- Borrowing or taking money from family and friends
- Having unpaid bills or disconnection notices
- Lack of food in the house
- Missing work or school
Showing one of these signs doesn’t mean that the family member you’re concerned about has issues with their gambling. There may be other things going on in their lives.
What can you do?
Talking to your parents or other adults about their gambling can be difficult, especially if you’re not sure how they will react.
If you’re worried that an adult in your life has an issue with their gambling, you might like to first talk to someone to help you work out the best way to approach the situation. This could be a family member, friend, a teacher or student welfare coordinator, or your doctor.
Do you want more help?
There are free and confidential helplines/online services for young people that are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week:
- Gamblers Help Youthline: (Victoria only): 1800 262 375
- Kids Helpline: 1800 551 800 or kidshelpline.com.au – chat, phone or email
- Headspace: headspace.org.au
To find out more about how we can help you, you or your family member or friend can start an online chat with us or call the Gambling Helpline on 1800 858 858 – free, confidential, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
These services are available to support anyone affected by gambling harm, including family members or friends like you. It’s not only the person who gambles that can be affected, but the people close to them too. It’s important to take care of yourself when you’re supporting someone else.
What can you do?
Teachers, health professionals, and other adults to support young people affected by gambling. Although they may not say anything, they can feel isolated, angry and depressed by what’s happening at home.
The good news is that you can help minimise the effect on them and support them emotionally. Here are some ways:
- Encourage them to talk freely about their feelings – but let them do this when they’re ready to
- Assure them that they are not responsible
- Try to keep them engaged in family activities
- Try not to over-involve them in helping to solve financial and other problems caused by gambling
- Ensure they understand that the family may need to budget – but that they will be OK
- Don’t put down the person with the gambling issue as this can be confusing for them – separate the person from the behaviour and acknowledge that the behaviour is of concern, not the person.
Talking to their parents or other family members about their gambling can be difficult for young people – especially if they’re not sure how they will react.
If they’re worried that an adult in their life has an issue with their gambling, you might like to help them work out the best way to approach the situation.
Do you want more help?
There are free and confidential helplines/online services for young people that are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week:
- Gamblers Help Youthline: (Victoria only): 1800 262 375
- Kids Helpline: 1800 551 800 or kidshelpline.com.au – chat, phone or email
- Headspace: headspace.org.au
To find out more about how to support young people in gambling families, you or the person you’re working with can start an online chat with us or call the Gambling Helpline on 1800 858 858 – free, confidential, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
These services are available to support anyone affected by gambling harm, including family members, friends, and professionals like you. It can be hard for professionals to support people with gambling issues. To learn more about how you can help, go to our section on How Professionals Can Help.
Are you concerned about the effects of your own gambling on young family members?
This page was designed for young people who are concerned about the gambling of family members and may be unhelpful or distressing for other audiences. If you have questions about this issue or just need to talk, you can reach out to our counselling team.
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